Death

So, when I was a teenager I always told myself that when I get older, I will understand death a little better…I am older now…it doesn’t seem any clearer today than it did then.  How does one feel as you slip away?  Do you feel scared?  Will you see God?  Will you have peace?  I would think it will all be ok, but sometimes I panic and think too hard about these silly things.  What will it feel like to be in heaven?  I can only comprehend what my human mind can think, so I guess it makes sense that it really doesn’t make a lot of sense.  We just have to have faith that it will all be ok and that God will take care of us.  If I think of heaven in a more human way…I can’t wait to sit with Jesus up there.   Death is scary for us humans though…the thought of loosing someone just makes my heart a little sad.  I sure hope Heaven is all that I think it will be (plus more).  I guess when I get to heaven, my apprehensions will be gone.  I bring this up because I heard this great song on the tv today.  Yes, “the Light” on Galaxie is a little mamsy pamsy (as Doug puts it), but I like it…most of the time.

Heaven Waits For Me – Jenny Simmons

My feet are deep down in the sand
The waves are pouring life into my soul

It's clear to me from where I stand
There's nothing else I want in this old world

I'm not afraid of letting go
If today's my last day, you should know
That I've loved so many people
And I've traveled this great world
Yeah I've spent time with Jesus
And I've held my little girl
I'm not holding back for next year
I'm living for today
When I take my final breath
I know I'm ready
Heaven waits for me

My husband is the strongest man
All our family and our friends make me smile
Yeah I've had my share of broken dreams
Sleepless nights and suffering
But all the while
That don't matter in the end
Maybe I'll go quietly
In my sleep with you next to me
Maybe it's a slow goodbye
Or I'm out of here in the blink of an eye
No matter how I leave this place
I know I'll see my Savior's face
With the ones I love right next to me
It's a beautiful thing,
Oh, life's a beautiful thing

Cause I've loved so many people
And I've traveled this great world
I've spent some time with Jesus
And I've held my little girl
I'm not holding back for next year
I'm living for today
When I take my final breath
I'm not leaving with regrets
I know I'm ready
Heaven waits for me
Oh yeah, Heaven waits for me

Doug & Stefani’s Disney Church

DSCF5543It has been an interesting few months.  We enjoyed a wonderful holiday with my parents to Florida.  I think I have them converted to the Animal Kingdom Resort…it is a beautiful resort and has great amenities for just relaxing and enjoying life.  We really enjoyed our 3 days cruise and even though it was so short, it was still worth it.  We have no other plans yet for this year, but hoping we can book into our Disney timeshare for December 3rd at the Grand Californian in Disneyland.  I understand it is slim to none, but we will try anyway.  If not then we will save up our points and do a big trip to Florida again in 2015.  Our timeshare points go way further at the Animal Kingdom Resort.

Our finances are slowly getting better, but that is because of what I had to do in January.  At least I don’t get phone calls anymore.  I am hoping to get a few more clients though so that we can actually make more money than just making ends meet.  Doug is enjoying his job, and is hoping to have his degree done this year so that he can actually get a good paying job by the end of the year. 

25th Anniversary Card - Page 001We are celebrating our 25th anniversary this summer so I am busy making party gifts, going through pictures and figuring out the guest list.  We will have a big party at my parents for friends and family (mostly friends from the past) and will have a small party at our place for some of our current friends who wouldn’t want to drive ALL THE WAY into Chilliwack.  It is interesting going through the old pictures and seeing how things have changed, both physically and even our inner self.  It is nice to grow up and learn things and change ones point of view if they need to be changed.  I don’t believe we should stay stuck in our ways if we notice that we might have been wrong.  I think people need to be more open to change.  We base our opinions on our life experience and as we get older, our life has been longer and we have had more experiences…so why wouldn’t they change? 

We have a friend (from an old church we used to go to), that came out awhile ago.  We weren’t surprised, but apparently others where.  Now he doesn’t go to that church anymore and he is in the wind when it comes to church (granted we are in the same boat).  Why does a person’s lifestyle make it so hard for people to except each other?  Especially Christians…don’t we have a higher standard to live by?  Me thinks Jesus would have been a little more loving to everyone and their lifestyles.  Doug and I don’t think normally when it comes to our Christian walk and we find it hard to fit into a church because of that.  I am guessing if Jesus was part of the church, we wouldn’t have any problems.  He was a rebel just like us…maybe he was taking cues from my future self?  HA HA HA…just kidding…remember God gave us with a sense of humour.  My views have changed on lifestyles…granted I never judged people before anyway, but now I realize what I thought was a no no before, I don’t think that anymore.  I think Jesus loves us all no matter what and who we choose as a soul mate is irrelevant.  I think it is our heart that he cares more about.  Are we living for Christ?  Are we going through life as if Jesus was right beside us (oh ya, he is) watching what we do?  Are we trusting him with everything we have and everything we are?  I think those are the things he really cares about.  Do people look at us and say “there is something different about them”?  I sure hope so because that is what I strive for.

So…what is with the title of my blog?  Well…let me tell you…

We went to a launch party…and if you aren’t a musician, you might not know what that is, but a launch party is what someone will do to “launch” their new endeavour, and in this case it was for a website that is for independent music artists.  Physically I fit right in…I dress uniquely and my hair…well it is unique even compared to a lot of the people who where there.  But emotionally, I did not fit in at all…I find musicians a little snobby…not because they are, but because they are just in their own world and tend to not wander outside their box in that way.  I am not into mingling much, so that part was hard for me too.  I wanted to fit in, but I just couldn’t…nobody seemed to like Disney…what is with that.  Then there is the place that I fit in the best…anything Disney.  Go to Disneyland/DisneyWorld/Disney Cruise and you are surrounded by fans, young and old.  Everyone loves Disney and everyone is just about as equally nuts about it as me.  That is where I fit in.  Granted my outer self (with the bright red hair) is more unique in that situation, but I can get away with wearing all things Disney and nobody does a second look.  There is a peace in my heart when I am surrounded by people who love what I love and don’t care about the uniqueness of who I am.  All they care about is that I love Disney as much as they do.  It is like we live in two worlds…one foot is in the musicians world (yes Doug is a musician) and one that is in Disney World…I prefer my foot in the Disney area.  So maybe it is time to start a Disney themed church.  You can only come if you love Disney, have a lifestyle you are proud of, and want to learn about Jesus and how loving he is, how wonderful he care for his kids and how much at peace you can be with him watching us.  Wonder if we would get sued by Disney LOL